Vuvuzelas in worship

Before last week I’d never heard of the word ‘vuvuzelas’ let alone heard one.

Seemingly, a vuvuzela is a traditional horn (if “becoming popular in South Africa in the 1990s” can be regarded as traditional) used at football matches. You may have heard one or two of them yourself if you’ve watched or listened to any of the World Cup matches on the electric television.

Loud

Seemingly they’re loud. Very loud.  Loud enough to frighten small children. And make you deaf.

The sound level of the instrument has been measured at 127 decibels (dB).  To put that in context: leaves rustling is about 13 dB, a quiet radio is about 40 dB, inside a bus is about 85 dB, thunder is around 110 dB, a jet taking off is around 130 dB, the threshold of pain is just over 130 dB!

Complaints

But there have been complaints and calls for vuvuzelas to be banned from matches. Seemingly they’ve already been banned at Wimbledon. And at chess matches. I imagine.

In worship

The question is what would Jesus do?

I think that the British churches should stand alongside these persecuted vuvuzela players (vuvuzelaists?) and on the weekend of the World Cup Finals final use them in the act of worship on Sunday morning.

Can you imagine it?

Vicar: I now invite the youth group band forward who will lead us in worship this morning on their brightly-coloured vuvuzela horns. So, let’s stand and sing together hymn number 14 ‘All things bright and beautiful’.

Congregation: All things bright and BVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVV!! BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!