One day I need to have ‘that’ chat with them

I imagine that in years to come the conversation may go a bit like this:

Me: Reuben, Joshua—come with me, I need to have an important chat with you.

Reuben and Joshua: Oh no! It’s ‘the sex chat’.

Me: No, it’s not ‘the sex chat’, I need to instruct you in the important and various methods of lacing up your shoes.

No one ever had that chat with me and I wish they did because it took me hours of experimenting to find the method that I like best, which is bottom-right to top-left and then lacing the remainder up with a nice, neat and even horizontal cross.

One day they will thank me.

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Gareth Saunders

I’m Gareth J M Saunders, 46 years old, 6′ 4″, father of 3 boys (including twins). Latterly, web architect and agile project manager at the University of St Andrews and warden at Agnes Blackadder Hall. Currently on sabbatical. I am a priest in the Scottish Episcopal Church, and I sing with the NYCGB alumni choir.

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