Installing broadband … it’s child’s play!

BT Broadband
BT Broadband Self-Install box, similar to the one that Peter and Dorothy received.

The trouble with BT Broadband Self-Install kits in this family is that what it really means is “Gareth-Install”. Feeling a little brighter this morning I drove down to Jane’s parents and sat behind her Dad’s desk and installed their 2Mb broadband package for them. But … not without a couple of hitches first!

One of the great things about computers these days is that alot of the instructions that come with them are so user-friendly. The BT broadband installation is not exception. Pop the CDROM in the drive, turn on the sound and sit back while a seductive female voice lures you into a false sense of hope as she talks you through plugging in ADSL microfilters, powering on the BT Voyager 2091 modem/router/wireless access point, plugging in the ethernet cable, and finally once the software has installed connecting the ADSL cable to make that all-important connection from the Big Blue Everything to your expectant computer.

It all went well. Congratulations! You are now connected, it said. “Now … before you do anything rash,” it advised, “switch off and let me reboot the computer.”
“Sure,” I almost purred back at her, clicked the Reboot button and … And when it restarted: nothing! The Big Blue Nothing.

There is something satisfying, and yet at the same time inherently annoying with Windows about knowing that 9 times out of 10 whenever I reboot the computer and about every peripheral situated within a 20m radius of it it’s likely that the problem will have fixed itself when it wakes again from the dead. That’s what fixed it: I powered down the PC, powered down the Voyager 2091 — the name alone made me feel like I was doing some important mission for Space Cadets — and then powered them back up in reverse order.

Would you believe it: it worked! Oh, and for some reason I didn’t have to use the Connect to BT Yahoo! Broadband logon button, as the instructions had promised. It just connected. I’m not complaining, the simpler is it for Jane’s folks the better.

I got WiFi setup, with a bit of WEP encryption, setup email and opened a new MSN Messenger account for Jane’s folks and then cleared off home for a rest.

Whew! Just as the picture on the box suggested: child’s play. (?!!)

Published by

Gareth Saunders

I’m Gareth J M Saunders, 52 years old, 6′ 4″, father of 3 boys (including twins). Enneagram type FOUR and introvert (INFP), I am a non-stipendiary priest in the Scottish Episcopal Church, I sing with the NYCGB alumni choir, play guitar, play mahjong, write, draw and laugh… Scrum master at Safeguard Global; latterly at Sky and Vision/Cegedim. Former web architect and agile project manager at the University of St Andrews and previously warden at Agnes Blackadder Hall.

6 thoughts on “Installing broadband … it’s child’s play!”

  1. I’m so glad it all went well for you. It went well for me for two weeks, then the router gave up the ghost, three phones calls to the help desk lasting from 43-58 minutes long to end up having them send out a new one. 10 days later no new router, more phone calls, order hadn’t even been placed. Week later, new router, installation disk starts 77% through the tutorial, decide to use previous one, all going well but now can’t connect to Broadband. More phone calls, ending up with a screen I didn’t recognise, speaking to someone I couldn’t understand, tears, and eventually a lady telling me she would send out a label for me to return the router as I’d now had more than I could take. To date, no label! Now thats a surprise! Decided I would have another attempt a week later. Guess what, disk starting mid way, with no way back, more phone calls for help, although my call was important to them and they thanked me for continuing to hold, 90 mins later I gave up. I don’t know what I’m doing with computers at the best of times, and I’ve found the BT helpdesk of no help what so ever, once my contract is up I’m out of here!

  2. That’s awful. I’m so sorry. I have to say that it was only because I’m fairly geeky with stuff like this that I managed to get it all to work. I found the instructions pretty useless and inaccurate in places.

    I suggest that you contact the Roger Gann at PCPlus Watchdog by sending an email to or write to PCPlus WatchDog, 30 Monmouth Street, Bath, BA1 2BW — they may be able to help sort things out. Judging by the feedback in PCPlus magazine ( they can often help get the job done. I hope that helps.

  3. BT Openworld (Option 1) went “live” at home yesterday. Spent over 5 hours trying to get the Voyager 2091 to co-operate. Succeeded with laptop but only with a fairly short ethernet (yellow) cable. Tried (after installing wireless usb adaptor) to connect another PC. No chance. I thought “wireless” meant just that. Does one computer always have to be connected to the voyager by this ethernet lead? If so this package has been a waste of time as both computers are not near sockets and to avoid cables being draped all over the house was the reason I signed up for the “wireless” package. Must admit I am useless with computers.

  4. HOOOOO boy sounds like I am not the only mystified one on the planet. We connected up to the router and now seem to have a cronic case of blue screanitus. Is there a conflict with this thing and some other program that will stop it all working?

  5. hey i got the voyager this morning but it doesnt seem to work with any wireless thing ive got psp/laptop etc. i put in all the details like dns servers and ssdi’s but it still wont work with anythin. anyone kno what im doing rong?(

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