Three chairs for Gareth!

It all began when I broke my chair a couple of weeks ago. I wasn’t doing anything unusual with my chair. I was sitting in it.

I believe in single-purpose furniture. The beauty and simplicity of design: a chair, a desk, a table, a bedside table, a bedside chair, a chair, a bed, another chair. See: simple. Jimmy Saville’s armchair that also made cups of coffee, and dispensed silver badges was, to my infant mind, just plain wrong! I don’t want to sit on something designed as a transformer, I want a chair. A good, solid chair.

This, however, wasn’t a good, solid chair. I sat on it once too often and it listed, like a sinking ship. So, I emailed Viking (from whom I purchased it). No problem they said, we’ll send you another one.

They did. The very next day. And it was a different model, too. An ‘upgrade’ they called it — they didn’t have my old model (the “Boss”) in stock any longer.

I eagerly built it. My new chair — the “Director” — only to discover that it is much, much shorter than any other chair I’ve ever used at my desk. In my life. Ever. In fact, I’m actually taller kneeling at my desk than sitting on my new chair.

I think I’m going to have to either send it back, or saw the legs off my desk. Or off myself.

I was looking at possible replacement chairs on the Ikea website. One says it is made of:

High resilient polyurethane foam (cold foam)

How disappointing: cold foam. I so much prefer those chairs made from boiling, hot foam. I’ll keep looking.

Published by

Gareth Saunders

I’m Gareth J M Saunders, 52 years old, 6′ 4″, father of 3 boys (including twins). Enneagram type FOUR and introvert (INFP), I am a non-stipendiary priest in the Scottish Episcopal Church, I sing with the NYCGB alumni choir, play guitar, play mahjong, write, draw and laugh… Scrum master at Safeguard Global; latterly at Sky and Vision/Cegedim. Former web architect and agile project manager at the University of St Andrews and previously warden at Agnes Blackadder Hall.

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